Dear Dallas Raines, Bri Winkler, Danny Romero, and Jonathan Novack:
I have been watching KABC’s “Eyewitness News” for as long as I can remember. Saying that, you can tell that I am very impressed with your anchors. Notice how I didn’t mention the weather “team.”
If you were a true team, you four would live your lives on the bench. Take this El Nino farce. You made it sound like in February each of us would need to buy arks. February was the hottest February on record.
Then, March was going to the rainy month. Okay, three rainy days so far. But none in the next week.
And 1/10 of an inch is not a storm. A drizzle for ten minutes is not a reason to go on “Storm Watch.” I can feel the rest of the rest of the country laughing at us. “Those weak Southern Californians,” while the east coast is mopping up after record rains. FEET of rain, not a miniscule amount.
A final thought: A Magic 8 Ball might not be the best “helper” for your forecasts.
You know the feeling when you are sick—not physically sick, mind you, you’re just wishing a particular something would leave and not return? Well, here are my things that if they left Planet Earth I would be thrilled. Warning: I’m not crazy, just random.
- Storm Track on KABC: Since when is 1/8 of an inch of rain a storm? I can feel the rest of the country laughing at those weak Southern Californians.
- Ripped jeans: It’s not exactly chic to dress like a slob.
- “The Bachelor”/”The Bachelorette”: There isn’t that much crying at a funeral.
- TLC: Okay, I admit I watch it; after all, isn’t it The Learning Channel? Still, how are “My Gypsy Wedding” and “Return to Amish” educational?
- The word “viral”: Viral is something that makes you miss a day or two of school. Viral can’t “go.”
- Pop-Ups: If I want you, I will click on you.
- Game invites on Facebook: See above.
- Christmas now beginning in September: Excuse me, but isn’t Christmas in winter?
And my personal favorite:
I’m embarrassed for them.
- Dressing up pets as children: They are animals, after all (sorry, Maggie)!